It's Time to Make a Friends

There's a certain beauty in being a lone wolf. You have more time to do things you want to do, like take introspective walks, read books, write poetry, and other solitary endeavors. If you want to diversify your options, though, there are literally billions of potential friends in the world. What's more, many of these people want to make friends just as much as you do. So consider these suggestions to meet people and form strong, lasting friendships.

1. Spend more time around people. If you want to make friends, you first need to put yourself out there somehow. Friends seldom come knocking on your door while you sit at home watching TV. If the people you're already around (e.g. at work or school) aren't friend material for whatever reasons, it's not the end of the world.
* Join a club with people who have common interests. You don't necessarily have to have a lot of common interests with people in order to make friends with them. In fact, some of the most rewarding friendships are between two people who don't have much in common at all, but if you have something in common with people, it can make it a lot easier to start a conversation and plan activities together.
* Use the web but get out! Websites like Meetup.com is aiming to bring people together with common interest. You can join to any group or just start your own. Great way to meet new local people!
* Join a sports team. A common misconception about this is that you have to be really good at playing a particular sport in order to make friends with others on the team, but not all teams are so competitive. As long as you enjoy the sport and support your teammates, joining a local team with a laid-back attitude could be a great way to make new friends.
* Volunteer. Volunteering is a great way for people of all ages to meet others. By working together you build bonds with people, and you might meet others who have a passion for changing things the way you do—a common cause.
* Get online. In general, the Internet is a great place to make friends, but... it's also easy to invest a lot of time online with someone you think of as a friend, but then you never meet because of time and distance. Expect to have to sift through a lot of people online before you find the one or two great friends, the kind who will be there for you when you really need them. The Internet can also help you find other people around the world who share your interests even if you live in an isolated place. And even though the Internet is a great place in general you still have to be cautious because not every person you meet online are who they say they are.
2. Talk to people. You can join a club, go to school, or go to church, and you still won't make friends if you don't actually talk to people. By the same token, you don't have to be involved with an organization to talk to people, and any time you talk to someone, you have a chance at making a lasting friend. You can talk to anybody: the clerk at the video store, the person sitting next to you on the bus, or the person in front of you on the lunch line. Don't be too picky. Most conversations will be a dead-end of sorts--when you may never talk to that person again, or you just remain acquaintances--but once in a while you'll actually make a friend.
* Make eye contact and smile. If you have an unfriendly countenance, people are less likely to be receptive to your friendship. Look approachable by not squinting (get some glasses), frowning or appearing blankly deadpan, such expressions may look troubled or disinterested.
* Start a conversation. There are many ways to do this; a comment about your immediate environment (The weather is a classic: "At least it's not raining like last week!"), a request for help ("Can you help me carry a few boxes, if you have a minute?" or "Can you help me decide which one of these is a better gift for my mom?") or a compliment ("That's a nice car." or "I love your shoes."). Follow up immediately with a related question: Do you like this warm weather? What kinds of gifts do you normally buy for your mom? Where did you get shoes like that?
* Make small talk. Keep the conversation light and cheery. Even if you're complaining about something, make sure it's something you're both dissatisfied with, and emphasize the positive—how such a situation can be avoided in the future, or alternatives. Bounce a few words back and forth for a little bit.
3. Introduce yourself towards the end of the conversation. It can be as simple as saying "Oh, by the way, my name is...". Once you introduce yourself, the other person will typically do the same. Remember his or her name.
4. Initiate a get-together. You can chat your heart out but it won't get you a friend if you don't open up the opportunity for another conversation or meeting. This is especially important if you meet someone who you aren't otherwise likely to meet again. Seize the day!
* If you've discovered that the person you're talking to has a common interest, ask him or her more about it and, if appropriate, whether they get together with others (in a club, for example) to pursue this interest. If so, this is a perfect opportunity to ask about joining them. If you clearly express interest (when? where? can anyone come?) they'll probably invite you. If you have a club, band, church, etc. that you think they might enjoy, take the opportunity to give them your number or email address and invite them to join you.
* Ask them out for lunch or coffee. That will give you a better opportunity to talk and get to know each other a little bit better. A good way to extend yourself is to say: "Hey, well, I've got to go, but if you ever want to talk over lunch or coffee or anything like that, let me give you my number/e-mail address." This gives the person the opportunity to contact you; they may or may not give you their information in return, but that's fine. Maybe they don't have time for new friends—don't take it personally! Just offer your contact info to whoever seems to be potentially a good friend, and eventually somebody will get in touch.
* Don't do anything to pressure someone into being friends with you. Never chide acquaintances for failing to invite you to a party, for example; don't call someone repeatedly or stop by uninvited (unless you have established that stopping by unannounced is o.k.); and refrain from overstaying your welcome anywhere. In general, take friendship slowly, and don't try to force intimacy to grow quickly; the move from acquaintance to friend can take a long time. It's understandable to want more of a good thing, but try to err on the side of less. If you are not sure about the pace of your new friendship, check in with your friend and ask directly. Too much, too fast can be scary or intimidating, and not everybody is able to say "Slow down..." - instead, they may run the other way!
5. Be a good friend. Once you've started spending time with potential friends, remember to do your part (i.e. initiating some of the activities, remembering birthdays, asking how the other person is feeling) or else the friendship will become unbalanced and an uneasiness or distance is likely to arise.
* Be reliable. If you and your friend agree to meet somewhere, don't be late, and do not stand them up. If you're not going to make it on time or make it at all, call them as soon as you realize it. Apologize and ask to reschedule. Don't make them wait for you unexpectedly; it's rude, and it is certainly not a good way to launch a potential friendship. When you say you'll do something, do it. Be someone that people know that they can count on.
* Be a good listener. Many people think that in order to be seen as "friend material" they have to appear very interesting. Far more important than this, however, is the ability to show that you're interested in others. Listen carefully to what people say, remember important details about them (their names, their likes and dislikes), ask questions about their interests, and just take the time to learn more about them. You don't want to be the guy or girl that always has a better story than anyone else or that changes the subject abruptly instead of continuing the flow of conversation. These people appear too wrapped up in themselves to be good friends--"one-ups-man-ship" is a put down.
* Be trustworthy. One of the best things about having a friend is that you have someone to whom you can talk about anything, even secrets that you hide from the rest of the world. The key to being a good confidante is the ability to keep secrets, so it's no secret that you shouldn't tell other people things that were told to you in confidence. Before people even feel comfortable opening up to you, however, you need to build trust. Be honest about yourself and your beliefs, and don't gossip about others or spread rumors or they will think you like stories better than friends.
* Be there. You've probably heard of fair-weather friends. They're the ones who are happy to be around you when things are going well, but are nowhere to be found when you really need them. Part of being a friend is being prepared to make sacrifices of your time and energy in order to help out your friends. If a friend needs help with an unpleasant chore, or if he or she just needs a shoulder to cry on, be there.
6. Choose your friends wisely. As you befriend more people, you may find that some are easier to get along with than others. While you always give people the benefit of the doubt, sometimes you realize that certain friendships are unhealthy, such as if a person is obsessively needy or controlling towards you, constantly critical, or introducing dangers or threats into your life. If this is the case, ease your way out of the friendship as gracefully as possible. Preoccupy yourself with other things, such as a new volunteer opportunity, so that you can honestly say that you don't have enough time in your schedule to spend time with them (but don't substitute their time for time with other friends; they may notice and become jealous, and more drama will ensue). Cherish those friends you make who are a positive influence in your life, and do your best to be a positive influence in theirs.

Find Your Soulmate

Many people feel that there's one person out there who can enrich your life in a way that no one else can. If this is true, how can you increase your chances of finding this person? And when you meet him or her, how will you know it's your soulmate?
Soulmate & Love Readings
1. Be the person you would love to love. Instead of waiting for your soulmate to appear, make yourself the person you would like to find. Work on becoming the unique individual you're looking for. Just as you would want your soulmate to be comfortable in their own skin, work on just being yourself. You'll stand a better chance of getting noticed if you are comfortable, confident, and happy to be you. Expressing your individuality is the closest you can come to advertising your soulmate potential. Not only will you stand out, but you'll also be doing things that are more likely to bring you closer to your soulmate, who probably has similar interests and goals.
2. Remember that your soulmate might not be what you expect. If there's only one person in the world who can be your soulmate, what are the chances that they'll live in your town, look like the people you grew up with, or even speak the same language? Your soulmate does not have to live in the same country or even the same hemisphere as you. You don't have to be willing to span the globe for your true love, but you do need to be receptive to people with different backgrounds. Also, if you're expecting your soulmate to be love at first sight, you might never find what you're looking for. So keep an open mind. Part of the romance of having a soulmate is being pleasantly surprised.
3. Be patient. Life doesn't normally work on the schedule you envision. Your soulmate might cross your path when you're 8 or 80 years old. Don't be surprised either if there is a considerable age difference between the two of you. Yes, you might look forward to spending the majority of your life with your soulmate—perhaps buying a house, getting married, starting a family—but things do not always go as you plan. Your soulmate will color your world no matter how old you are, so don't rush into things, or else you might end up forcing the wrong person into the soulmate box, which will cause pain for everyone involved.
4. Accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be. When you've got all these fantasies flying around in your head about how wonderful and special your soulmate will be, it can be easy to look for those specific characteristics and features in anyone you get involved with. Unfortunately, unrealistic expectations can ruin a relationship, and might even chase your soulmate away. Whoever it is that you think might be your soulmate, appreciate their individuality and trust that if this person is your soulmate, they'll never need to change who they are for you, just like you'll never need to change who you are for them. That doesn't mean that you can't encourage them to try something new or help them to grow as a person, just don't force things on them that they are not comfortable with.
5. Weather the storms. Contrary to what popular media would have you believe, meeting your soulmate doesn't guarantee "happily ever after." Things won't get easier when you find that special someone, and in fact, they might get even harder. Ultimately, a soulmate is someone with whom you can grow, and the only way to grow together is to face challenges together. So if you put your heart and soul into a relationship, stick with it through the ups and downs, even when you question whether it's meant to be, and you might look back decades later and realize that you were with your soulmate all along. True love with your soulmate does not grow on its own: it must be cultivated and continually nurtured. So be lovable, and be willing to love like there is no tomorrow.

Show Your Love

Showing our love towards those who deserve it is an art. When you know it's real, or maybe pure enough to be shown, you have to know how to show it.
1. Be yourself. Don't play roles and don't try to act like the cliché lovers you've seen in movies or shows. Play your own music when it comes to showing love.
2. Use as few words as possible. Let your love shine through your actions and behaviors.
3. Try to be unpredictable.You can make him/her think you're not enthusiastic about something he/she likes, and then surprise him/her by doing something about it at the most unexpected time.
4. Make a small unexpected comment or sentence about your own feelings at an appropriate time that is also emotionally penetrative, especially with a tone showing you're not waiting for a response.
5. Remember what you've said and in fact claimed. Your actions are going to prove or disprove it and he/she is waiting to see whether you keep your word or not.
6. Think and act spontaneously, Do be prepared (like you're reading this), but don't exactly pre-plan anything.
7. Use the circumstances coming up to show your love. When you do it during a normal talk or in normal situations, it won't impress him/her. It will be sort of cliché. So use the situations that come up. When you choose circumstances to show your love, it's like you pick a tool for doing it and believe me:it's a good tool.
8. Show your love to others by showing your love for what they really like or to what interests them. This is another impressive tool. Learn how to use it.
9. Some people recognize or show love in different ways. For example, some people may show their love by kissing and touching, while another person may show love by doing things or just having quality time with the one they love.

It's Time To Say I Love You

Although many people use this powerful phrase loosely, there are times when you want to say "I love you" in a meaningful way. Whether you're professing your love to a romantic partner or expressing it to a relative or friend, it can be difficult to convey how much they really mean to you. But by keeping the following suggestions in mind, hopefully your love will not only be understood, but it will also be welcomed and returned.
1. Define love The sincerity of the phrase is strengthened by knowing what love is, and what loving someone means to you. Determine the difference between love, infatuation and lust, and make sure it's genuine love that you feel for this person.
2. Make it special. For many people, dropping the "I" allows the sentiment to be expressed casually, such as before separating (e.g. "Time to go. Bye! Love you!"). Using the full phrase, however, can be reserved for more intimate moments, especially during a special event, such as when a child is just born, or even to reassure someone when bad news has been received or during moments of cherished silence, like after a kiss.
3. Make eye contact. If you love this person, hopefully you feel comfortable enough to gaze into their eyes when you express your feelings. Making eye contact shows sincerity and communicates trust.
4. Say it at an appropriate tone. If you're at home and there's not much background noise, keep your volume low; don't whisper unless you bring your lips to their ear, which can also be a very intimate way to express your love. If you want to tell them how you feel in public, it's up to you whether you want to pull the person aside, or say it in front of friends or even strangers. It depends on your loved one's personality, and your own personality. Some will find it terribly romantic to be told they're loved across a room full of people; others may find it mortifying.
5. Smile. It can be nerve-wracking to tell someone that you love him or her, only to wait anxiously for their response--especially if it's the first time either of you have verbally expressed love. The best way to overcome this fear is to not expect the phrase in return. Your intention can be to tell the person how you feel, with the hope of making them happy and showing them that they are valued. Remember that unconditional love means not demanding anything in return. So smile, and perhaps give your loved one a hug. If they love you, too, they'll say it in their own way and in their own time.
6. Be creative. Say it in different languages. Write it into a poem or even a haiku. If you want to be romantic, spell it out with rose petals on his or her bedroom floor. Write it in code, like a Vigènere cipher. Say it in little ways, like post-it notes in unexpected places, and express it in every way you can.
7. Love. Don't just say it, do it. Love is not just a feeling; it's an action. Saying it without showing it is, in a way, a lie. Express your love in action as well as in words.